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Archive for March, 2010

Beautiful in its time

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Well, lingering mind…aaaah, can not pour out so many things on my head at one time…these days too many wonderful things happened to me unexpectedly…I am the happiest creature in my room, hahahaha! Well, simply put, I finally got myself back after several confusing days for something that I do not think I would get the answer. I simply now accept that with joyful heart, because that is the only part of mine. Telling the truth, I feel like I am going to stop thinking. I can not control my own thought, it feels like my thought is not part of me, but it is another person….For nights I could not sleep because my mind is still awake in the deep of nights and so I recall everything I dislike and rethink of things I would rather forget. Those were so horrible nights.

Just to remind me of the time when everything is beautiful, blossoming flowers in its time…This thought would replace all the must-forget thoughts. Beautiful in its time, what a very encouraging and awesome phrase I have heard thousand times, but I just found the deeper meaning quite recently. I love this phrase ever since I heard it for the first time…I could say I let my tears down for hearing the same phrase over and over again. Realizing how many times even a day I could feel my spirit down, craving for encouragement from others, yet no one seems able to do that. No one seems to understand me. Then, this verse comes to me….everything will be beautiful in its time. Well, it is so simple and true. It brings me back to the source of life. So, it is not one who is mortal whom I should depend on, finally I thought. It is God whom I shall put all my praise into that I shall depend on.

It took me days and maybe years to understand to the heart for that simple truth! Yet God is trully working in mysterious ways, hmm. He enjoys surprises and smiley faces when his children found the treasures he meant to discover. No doubt that his treasures have eternal value and so worthed more than anything, so it is necessary for every believer to hunt for it instead of putting all the efforts on temporary and valueless treasures.

Embrace my past

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Suddenly I pictured myself when I was in a college second year. I was just moving in a bigger lodging house with about 30 lodgers in a two-story house owned by a remote island rich man whose daughter was later accepted in the same alma-mater, Dept. of Architecture & Planning, Gadjah Mada University. I just lost my money on the previous rent. I decided to move out at once because of two unbearable reasons; the mysterious pervert was seen peeping through my window around midnight, and once through the leveled wall below the ceiling inside the bathroom. Second, my room was just next to an empty land that was later constructed an additional building, and during construction the noise was bothering me. So, I decided to look for new place to stay.

I had to use up my savings for the new rent rate that was higher, so it came to me to have a side-job. I was trying to apply to McD as waitress but there was no vacation. At that time around 1996, there wasn’t much chance to do side-jobs because places like internet cafe was not booming yet, only very few and still expensive. The video and software rental was not as booming as todays. One of my friends had a side-job at a radio station. I was thinking that I was not the one who could speak so much. I would prefer to listen. Somehow I met my previous lodging owner, and she offered me to teach her children some subjects. I was glad and receiving it at once. Then I could save some money.

Second year of college I was joining the teaching assistant group for structure and construction studio, even though my grade was only A- and I know one person who always had a perfect mark for this and I admire her deep in my heart. She is so cool! Yet, she wasn’t that interested to be the teaching assistant. I, despite of my less ability, had passion to do the job! Then, when there was an opportunity to join the computer laboratory teaching assistant, I was also applying and that was my ultimate job until I was graduated and still had offering for some projects afterwards. I had chances to travel places like Palembang in Sumatra island, Bali two times, Surabaya, Malang & Jember in East Java (to note, Malang is my hometown), Makassar in South Sulawesi two times, Palu in Middle Sulawesi, and of course Jakarta, Bandung & Bogor in West Java. In some business trips, I was either sole or the leader. I really enjoyed my period of traveling in Indonesia’s cities and towns. It was unforgettable moments.

Now, I am in Japan for the second time! And this is not beyond my dreams…I have conceived these dreams long ago, and surprisingly all costs were paid in full even overflowing! What a blessings! First time in Japan was about 6 years ago, in Osaka, that gave me chances to go to Kyoto several times, Nara, and Kobe and also visited Wakayama. I also enjoyed Universal Studio in Osaka before I ended my one-year stay during which I had a chance to travel to South Korea for three weeks, to Daegu, Daejon, and Gyeongdong area where there is traditional village. I experienced the warmth of Korean people and the delicious culinary! Second time in Japan, I am now staying in Tokyo area, and had a chance to climb mount Fuji, visiting some interesting places like Yokohama Chinatown, Kobe chinatown once again, Tokyo Disney Land, and also had a cheap flight back to Indonesia during Christmas and new year, spending three days in Kuala Lumpur Chinatown.

Now that I am thinking about this….these are so marvelous experience! I also had many good companions either just strangers during travel or new friends! I never forget them! I don’t know how much I want to treasure them, yet I am lack of the ability to be extrovert! I am innately introvert…I wish to be available more to my friends. The best thing about traveling and staying abroad is I know what I am afraid is nothing more than what is in my mind.

Winter is no longer as threatening as the first time I encountered it!! I now am able to embrace the winter coldness and the beauty of nature, the freezing water…and true white snow! I understand now what the Bible says about as white as snow…there is nothing whiter than the snow. This was altering my thought and broadening my view over my own ability, so to say. The fact that there is no constraint but only the dimension of my thought.

Remembering what Einstein said that true  intelligence is not knowledge but imagination. I sense the truth here about myself. I am beyond what I could think of. I just need to go out there and feel the atmosphere. The nature is calling me out to touch it and enjoy the beauty…even the beauty of the nature of people and their built environment.

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